My love-hate relationship with phone calls.
I do like phone calls. But I also… don’t.
I’ve always romanticised the idea that one day, the realisation that I am in love will hit me while on a phone call with the culprit. You can blame it on my many delulu theories again (like this one). I have so many of them, and I am generous enough to let you in on them from time to time.
Honestly, I think it will pull my heartstrings so much. I picture it as a call that stretches for hours, the kind that goes from one good topic to another, and somewhere in between… it just hits me. Well, in response to what this person had already established in clear terms about pursuing me (we don't play games over here lol), my heart finally catches up.
Of course, all of this is in addition to deeper convictions that go beyond what a phone call can reveal.
The funny thing is, I don’t even like phone calls like that.
I know it sounds ridiculous coming from someone who’s often called a good conversationalist.
“Debola can gist.”
Yes, but…unless it’s a scheduled call, or we’re close and I actually enjoy talking to you, phone calls actually make me nervous. They trigger something in me that I can’t explain.
Something close to it would be… how it feels like when you get tapped on the shoulder when you’re deep in thoughts. Or when someone knocks at your door when you're not expecting company. That's exactly how I feel about an incoming call many times.
So, when I hear my phone ring, before I see the caller ID, and decide if I want to pick or not, my default response is always, “please nobody should be calling me.”
It’s worse when it’s an unknown number. Who are you, and what do you want? I don’t say a word until they speak first. That’s what my mother taught me, and who am I to disobey wisdom?
However, I think that's why I like to schedule calls. It helps me mentally prepare for it, and flow better. There have been calls where I sounded rather grumpy, deliberately using a tone that suggests that I don't want to be on that call longer than five seconds. But on the other hand, there have been times when I crave good phone calls, even to the point of using it as a reward system.
I tell myself, “Get through this to-do list, and then call your so-and-so.”
It sounds small, maybe even silly, but it works. On such calls, oh, I would sound like the sweetest person you know, trust me. You need to see me in my element on a good call. My goodness! I could be there for hours, laughing so hard, hopping from topic to topic. Especially if the other person knows how to hold a good conversation, too. Those are the kinds of calls that make anyone nearby curious about who’s on the other end.
Another kind of call that moves me is “prayer calls” with friends, where we’re not only catching up but we’re also covering each other. Interceding. Believing together.
It really is so special. Usually, it begins with a moment of vulnerability, and from there, a little shambala enters the equation as the Spirit takes over. Love it!
Therefore, I do like phone calls. But I also… don’t.
Lately though, I’ve been thinking about how fickle phone calls can be. One moment, it’s just another call you’re not in the mood to pick. The next, it could be a moment you never get back. I was supposed to call a friend on her birthday back in January. I even set a reminder, told myself I’d do it later in the day. But somehow, I got distracted by the exams I was writing at the time.
When I eventually got the opportunity, she was no longer reachable. I heard she was gone a few weeks later. Guys, just like that!!! Although I know one phone call wouldn’t have changed everything, I still carry the pain of not hearing her voice one last time. The things we take for granted!🥹
💌: On another important thought. . .
One day, I realised that God doesn’t have to pause His conversation with someone else to talk to me or you. He’s present with each of us at the same time. He’s always listening, and ready to give good counsel.
Unlike me or anyone else with a love-hate relationship with calls, God is always in the mood to have a conversation. My pastor used to say, “God, our Father, doesn't have mood swings like our ‘African parents.’” That line has stayed with me for a while because it reiterates this truth:
Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know. (Jeremiah 33:3 NIV)
I hope this blessed you. I would love to hear your thoughts. 💌
Yours in Quality time, Adébọ́lá. 🦋
Love this!
I love phone calls though. I'm a terrible texter (I don't know if that's a real word). I've given up on myself when it comes to that, there's no redeeming there.😂💀
My issue with phone calls is those who don't know how to converse and just dull your vibe because there's always something to discuss with me, even the most random things.😂😭
The only phone calls that make me anxious are when my Dad texts “Can we talk?” and then I have to call him or whenever I have to call a lecturer.😂😭💀
'God doesn't have mood swings...' is funny, yet very true.
Thank you, Debs.🥰